mom: let me see your blog.
me: *throws computer out of window*
me: what blog?
That awkward moment when you fall in love with a...
forever-and-alwayss: “Let’s take this to the bedroom“ I say seductively as I pick up my laptop to so I can continue blogging until 5 in the morning.
Me without a phone or computer:
While listening to music:
Normal people: - Singing the lyrics ME: - Singing the lyrics - Singing guitar riffs - Doing air drumming - Headbanging
reblog if you think you're not beautiful enough.
alexanderdirect: I want to send you a message. All of you.
If you need someone to talk to I'm always here ....
I’m a cutter and a bulimic . If anyone needs someone to talk to I promise I’m always here for you . I’ll never judge you I promise <3 Any questions , just ask <3 ~Love yourself~ http://www.facebook.com/#!/omgeeitzalex
Why being a girl isn't working out for me:
Body: Oh, guess what time of the month it is!
Me: Please, god, no--
Ovaries: ALL SYSTEMS GOOOOOOOO!!!
Brain: I quit. i quit. kittens and cupcakes and no one loves me. oh my god salty snacks i am furious
Me: Please, guys, calm down--
Face: TIME TO RUIN EVERYTHING YOU HAVE EVER LIKED ABOUT ME. I'M GROWING MOUNTAINS, BITCHES.
Brain: And now I'm ugly! shbdksdnksbn
Torso: Time to practice labor. cramp this bitch up. GO GO GO GO GO GO
Me: STOP IT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!
Stomach: lol clothes cant fit you anymore. you are bloated. you are now a balloooooooon!
Me: I hate you all
Brain: I KNOW EVERYONE HATES ME I AM SO DEPRESSED. we need to procreate.
Face: Lol, i'm not done yet.
Uterus: what did i ever do to deserve this?
Brain: you just wait uterus. they're going to make you hold a baby for like 9 months straight.
Uterus: You mother fuckers.
Me: I quit being female, I am now a llama.
Brain: Me gusta.
Christmas: Then and now...